Matthew 6:33 (NLT)

and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.
Saturday, July 16, 2011

Bullies at Church Camp? REALLY???

Well after 2 days of crying and stomach aches, Hunter finally broke down and told me what was bothering her.  As a mom, I totally know my girls, and I know when something is bothering them.  I knew it was more than her just missing me!  So finally yesterday afternoon through sobs and a horrible stomach ache, she confided in me.  I don't mean to publicize her problem, but this is our first dealing with bullying and I am really not quite sure how to handle it all.

I guess while at camp there was this girl...who did not attend our church, but was from a different church ( So I felt better about this situation knowing it was not going to be a weekly thing that Hunter would have to deal with).  This girl was younger than Hunter (well in a lower grade, but might not have been younger in age).  She had told Hunter to carry all her luggage to her cabin....why I have no idea!  But Hunter told her no.  This girl proceeded to tell Hunter she was STUPID (which is a bad word in our house) and twisted her arm :-(  My heart BROKE hearing her tell me this through her sobs!  Now luckily for Hunter her friend was there with her and took care of her and took her away from this girl.  I am so blessed that Hunter has some really good friends who will watch out for her :-)

Now the second incident was by a girl who WAS from our church...close to the same age, but in a lower grade.  Now this little girl has been to our house and played....sleepovers...very sweet little girl.  I hear that she was a tad of trouble at camp, and I know it was not an attack against Hunter personally, but she screamed at Hunter and told her she was an IDIOT!  Again my heart broke!

Now some of you know that Hunter has had a rough year this past year (3rd grade)...and a lot of you don't.  It was the main reason for starting this blog in the first place.  I know I have made a few hints about a later post and such :-)  I was trying to wait a little bit longer, but I think it will help with this bullying and my struggles with how to handle it.

After a VERY frustrating year of home schooling with Hunter...and seeing her struggle more than normal with school this past year...I started doing some research!  Those of you who know me well know how OCD I can get :-)  I spent WEEKS up late on the internet, talking to friends, talking to more mature home schooling parents, talking to "professionals" and such.  After all this research, and knowing my husbands history, I had Hunter and Logan assessed for Dyslexia!  I am still planning a later post...probably next week...to go over this more in depth.  How I came to figure it all out and such....but for now...for this post...both Hunter and Logan are dyslexic...Hunter is considered severe dyslexic.  I am going to be taking a class the beginning of August that will help me learn to teach them the way they need to be taught  I am super excited about this class and very excited to share all this with you! (Like I said before I have MUCH wisdom and knowledge to share with EVERYONE!)

Now back to this whole bullying problem.  Over the past months I have seen Hunter struggle with playing with her friends...just seeing the look on her face, that she is not at the same level as her friends.  Now I am by no means saying she is stupid or slow...but the look in her eyes was that of "I'm stupid"...which totally broke my heart...knowing she felt this way...which is when I started on my quest of trying to help her.  Those who know Hunter knows she is VERY intelligent and super smart.  And even talking to the professional who assessed the girls...she told me by no means hold her back a year (which I was considering) because she is so intelligent...it would hurt her more than help her if I held her back.  So we are working on a 4th grade plan for her with a few adjustments to some subjects...again getting ahead of myself.

But with these 2 comments of her being stupid and an idiot really really hurt her deeply...which breaks my heart!  I am at a loss on how to help her.  I talked to her about how God sees her and how beautiful and smart she is.  I told her that sometimes people are just mean and sometimes friends hurt your feelings.  Now the 1 girl does go to our church and was considered her "friend".  So how do we deal with this?  Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.  I know she needs to learn how to handle this and I can't always just call up the girls mom's and such...but what does a mom do to guide her daughter in the godly way to handle situations like this?  I know this is a learning experience for both of us...but with learning to deal with this learning disability and her knowing she is not up to par with her friends...I am just afraid to do more damage :-)

2 comments:

Onderick Multiomedia said...

I could give her a few of Bob Onderick's input on dealing with billies!
Great post
Allan

Diana Onderick said...

I am sure that input would not be the Christ like way of handling it :-)